This is the third and final part in my Charlie & Me
story. This won’t be the last time I bring up stuff from my past. There are
still some parts missing here but to keep the story as interesting as possible
I have removed some of the more boring stuff. This is also going to be quite a
short conclusion. Although light on words I hope it will resonate with a few of
you. We good? Let’s continue
In my last post I talked about a series of really horrible
events that happened to me a good number of years ago, events that led me to
resent who I was. I thought by throwing away Charlie it would somehow make me
happy but in actual fact it did the total opposite.
It wasn't until my third year of University, spurred on by
my then new partner that I decided to open up again about my past and who I
was. Then it hit me. I wasn't resenting myself, I resented everyone who had
made me feel weak for no reason other than that they could. I wasn't to blame,
they were.
I decided it was time I made some changes.
The few years between then and now have been ones of self
discovery once again. I've made significant changes to both my Trans and non
Trans side in terms of who I speak to and who I trust. For some a closing
circle of friends may sound like a tragedy, a sickening effect on the way I was
treated however I see it as nothing but a positive. I know who I can talk to
and trust with any issues I have. There was though one lingering question that
needed to be answered. When was I going to come out publicly?
I’m going to write a feature on this in more detail soon but
I’d just like to shed some light on my decision to take some steps to openly
come out as Trans. This year I wanted to have a more positive outlook and take
more control over my life, this also meant coming out. At the start of the year
I began to open up. It could be said that I had not learned the lessons from
the past but why should a bad experience deter me from being me? I’d made the
decision to come out to my family by the end of 2014. So far it looks like I’m still on track.
The next step in my journey is to open up to my family. Some
of my family knows and those who do who have been incredible rocks during this
process. I spend quite significant amount of time as Charlotte and am venturing
out for the first time as me. And I honestly couldn't be happier. I can’t
remember a time of my life where I've felt as happy or as positive as I do now.
The journey from then to here has been one of ups and downs,
highs and lows. There have been some absolutely amazing times which I may
document here in the future but also times of despair. My hope is by letting
you all in it will benefit us all. Nobody should have to live in fear of being
who they are and I hope I can in some small way do something to aid in our
cause.
Charlie xx
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You look wonderful! What a beautiful hair =)
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